I wrote my essay of enterdance a week ago. It was total disaster. I was so sure it is easy enough for me. For me who got 95 points form 100 my final essay couple years ago. 10 thems – there should still be something to pick, I thought. There were 12 themes and none to take. Good that lector said that we can write on our own theme as well. It gave me chanche to write something and if it could not fit under any of topics there then I could think out my own. But still.. my head was so empty that I heard how my thoughts had echo. I was sitting and thinking and nothing came on my mind. I had no good start for my essay. I didn’t had even any idea what to write about. I did wrote A4 sheet of nonsens and cross it all off again. And then I just decided to put down what I feel. So I wrote how I want to stand on the edge of the world and scream out my pain. About the hole in me and how to fill it up. I even cried when I wrote about it =) Sweet. I regeret it later what I did write. Because they told they use it during conversation with me.

There wre 3 men and a woman in the room. I knew 2 of them. Senior and Junior Hamers. Both of them are very respected vicars of Lutherian Church. The 3rd old man was unknown for me like the woman. Junior was asking from me why did I dicided to come in this college and where did I got information about it. Then he asked about my job. And then he asked from others, do they have questions. They were just sitting and watching eachother and had no questions. I had to call back half past 3 PM to get to know am I in or not.

My elder brother was at me. I was all excited and forgot to call at the time they asked and called an half hour later. But it was alright. They were still there and told me I am in. Yeah, I am in.